Dreaded Midlife Crisis or Midlife Awakening
What would ageing look like if we took the 'crisis' out of midlife?
Questioning the Ageing Narrative
Are you at the brink of midlife struggling to find your footing in this lifescape?
Could it be that you believe the voices telling you that ageing is a crisis and something to fear and dread? And, that your best years are behind you and that you should go quietly into the night.
Yet, among the voices scrambling to send you quietly into the night, a gentle voice whispers:
‘It’s not true. You still have so much life left in you.’
Midlife Is a Time of Growth Instead of Decline
Contrary to the persistent narrative that midlife means you’re becoming obsolete, it’s a time of potential growth rather than decline.
Recent population statistics reveal the growth rate of the ageing population is said to reach 52.7 million by 2025 and is set to skyrocket to 1.6 billion globally by 2050.
Essential Midlife Roles
Lest we forget that midlife, like every other life stage, is a natural progression of life. It’s about evolving from one phase of life to the next. With midlife adults preoccupied with up to eight essential roles, they hold positions of considerable influence on present and future generations.
You’re a spouse or life partner and a parent. You’re sandwiched between two generations as a grandparent and caring for your ageing parents. You’re juggling a job or career and serving in your community while maintaining a vibrant social life, hobbies, and interests.
You answer to many names, and fill many roles, but ‘obsolete’ doesn’t apply. With so many voices scrambling to impose identities on you that don’t always fit your true nature, whose voices do you believe?
Challenges Associated with Midlife
Undoubtedly, the midlife stage involves a range of life shifts, including physiological and psychological and environmental changes. These shifts can be overwhelming. Using the term 'midlife crisis' only creates unnecessary anxiety because it suggests that you're experiencing an emergency or catastrophe. It intensifies the natural emotional adjustments associated with ageing and can incite a sense of panic.
Midlife and the Empty Nest
Take, for example, empty nesters, whose children are gaining independence, leaving home, and separating from the family. Both parent and child will need to adjust to the relational shifts. For parents, it includes understanding that you’re not losing value in your child’s life. Your role is simply shifting to something new.
Midlife and Career
For those parents who’d set aside their careers to focus full-time on parenthood, this is a time of re-adjustment, self-exploration and re-alignment. With a new window of time opening, midlife presents welcoming opportunities to regain one's sense of individuality. And to shift the focus to personal dreams and aspirations again and to check if your current job aligns with these. It’s also a time to explore how you’ve evolved and find meaningful ways to embrace a new life chapter.
Viewing the mid-life transition as a time of 'crisis' doesn't help.
What could happen if we removed the panic from the term dreaded midlife crisis?
Isn’t it time to shift this unhelpful narrative and promote a more empowered view of midlife?
The Midlife Awakening
The transition to midlife is an active process of awakening your innate self to a new life stage, taking stock of how you've evolved, and choosing how you wish to spend your time, energy, and resources. Then, take the leap and create your most meaningful chapter.
How would a term such as 'Midlife Awakening' fare better as an alternative to a dreaded crisis? Could it:
1. Better reflect the gentle and gradual transition that this period offers?
2. Reduce the negative connotations currently associated with ageing?
3. Better position the mindset, thoughts and emotions associated with midlife?
4. Help those new to midlife embrace it as a time of growth and discovery?
5. Reframe this season as a natural transition with ease and grace?
Empowered Midlifers
Although there are necessary adjustments associated with ageing, approaching these with a catastrophic mindset undermines and contradicts the strengths mid-lifers hold. By midlife, you've gained the life skills, wisdom, and resilience to competently mitigate the associated challenges and opportunities with confident rationale.
Summary
To sum up, this newsletter queried the influence of the ageist narrative that midlife is a time to dread and fear. It highlighted the valuable roles midlifers occupy in society and positions this life stage as a natural evolution through life seasons. It offers an alternative term that empowers mid-lifers to embrace and thrive in this new chapter.
Midlife is a powerful new season and its essence is captured in a provoking quote by Maya Angelou:
My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive, and to do so with passion, humour, and some style.
Maya Angelo
For more insights about ways to thrive on purpose in midlife, subscribe to my newsletter.
Until next time, let’s thrive on purpose in midlife.
Are you new to midlife, or need a change to live a more fulfilling life but don’t know how or where to start? I’ve designed a Midlife Roadmap that offers you a place to start. It’s a self-paced, digital course that gives you the freedom to explore your life at your leisure and in private. Click the link above for a sneak peek.